Are you saggin’?

What up, peeps?  So, as some of you know, at the start of the new year, I went back on my diet.  And I’m doing it for real this time.  Been going to the gym, eating healthy, the works.  Let’s not call it a diet.  It’s my new way of life.  Anyways, I have some fears about losing a bunch of weight.  I have dreams of losing weight and looking something like Ryan Reynolds.  That would be nice wouldn’t it?  I mean, if I’m gonna do it, I might as well do it right, right?  So, for inspiration, I’ve been looking up pictures of what it looks like when people lose a lot of weight.  Just FYI–I’d like to lose around 200lbs…that’s about half of my body.  So, here’s what I’ve found:

What I look like now:



What I want to look like after I lose weight:



What I’m afraid I’ll look like after I lose weight:



What I’ll probably have to do if I look like that ^ after I lose weight:



Now, realistically, I don’t expect to ever look like Ryan Reynolds.  I mean, he trains in the gym for like, half of his life, and you know what Sweet Brown says…”Ain’t nobody got time for dat!”  Now, the picture of the guy with all the saggy skin is a little bit overkill for me.  That guy lost like, 500lbs, but still, saggy skin is a reality for me.  And I kinda feel like, which would I rather have?  Gross folds of saggy, baggy skin hanging from my arms, legs, stomach, and everywhere in between, or would I rather be a fatass forever?  I guess when it comes down to it, I would rather be healthy and saggy than to be a fatass who dies at 45, but really, I wish there were some other options.  But what about plastic surgery, you ask?  Yeah.  They do this thing called a corset trunkplasty, where they take you in across your belly and junk.  Estimated cost: $15,000.  End result:

Yeah…not much prettier than the saggy skin, is it?  This picture is a man who lost 300lbs, and this is 6 months after his surgery.  I’m just thinking, jeez…it kinda sucks either way.  Anyways, I guess becoming a bodybuilder is always an option.  I guess it’s not bad to be huge as long as your hugeness is caused my mounds of muscle and not folds of fat.  It might be nice to be able to lift a small plane with one hand, I guess.  I wouldn’t really have to worry about being mugged or anything anymore…So yeah, guess if all else fails, I’ll become a body builder!  Alright! Anyways, guess that’s it, even if I don’t have to worry about any of this for at least a year or more.  Leave it to me to always see the downside.  Whatevs.  See you guys tomorrow!

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Thought of the day–8/31/2012 “(Shrinking) Fatass in a skinny world” Diet: Week 5

Hey guys!  What’s up tonight?  So, sorry this post was not done earlier.  I would lie and say that I was really busy and so I couldn’t do it before I went to work, but I won’t.  I was sleeping.  So yeah, sorry about that.  Anyways, before I get to the diet update, I want to update you guys on some other things…firstly, this will be my last post for the next week or so.  I am going to go ahead and try to move my blog to it’s own website, so it will take me a bit to get that up and running.  So, until that time, no new posts!  Sorry guys!  BUT, the new site will have a re-vamped look, and hopefully, new pictures, and maybe the daily topics will be changed around a bit…thinking of doing a video here and there, but I haven’t decided yet.  Anyways, sorry guys, but I hope that my regular readers will bear with me and stick around to see the new site!  It’ll be better, I promise! So anyways, here is my diet update, and I’ll see you guys in a few weeks!

Diet: Day 29-

Current weight: 404 (down 5lbs.)

Clothing size: Pants-52-54, Shirt-5xl (still no change, but getting REALLY close! )


Left Bicep: 18in (down 1in) Right Bicep: 18in (down 1in)

Left Thigh: 33in (same as last week) Right Thigh: 33in (same as last week)

Stomach: 65.5in (down 1/5in)

Man-Boobs: 56in (same as last week)

As you can see, I DID lose weight this week, but my measurements didn’t change much.  I am, however, losing weight in my hands and feet, randomly.  I wear Chaco sandals a lot, which have adjustable straps, and here in the last week they are getting so loose, I’m gonna have to readjust them soon.  Also, my rings are practically falling off my fingers.  I can now fit my wedding band on every single one of my fingers, including my thumbs.  Might be time to get it resized soon…I definitely don’t want to lose it.  Anyways, now for the pictures!

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Thought of the day–8/24/2012 “(Shrinking) Fatass in a skinny world” Diet: Week 4

Hey there!  What’s up, guys?  So, as most of you regular readers know, last week on update day, my scale and I had a little disagreement as to how much I weighed, so I locked it in the dark closet to spend the rest of its days.  Well, yesterday, I went out and bought a new one, and sadly, it worked perfectly.  I say sadly, because it weighed me properly and showed me that my other scale had been lying right to my face.  Good thing I got rid of it.  It’s not good to keep a liar around, know what I mean?  Never can believe a thing they say.  Anyways, I guess my weight has been more than I thought this whole time (though not TOO much more), so anyways, here is a REAL update.

Diet: Day 22-

Current (Real) weight: 409

Clothing size: Pants-52-54, Shirt-5xl (still no change)


Left Bicep: 19in (up 1 in)
Right Bicep: 19in (same as last week)

Left Thigh: 33in (down 1.5 in.)
Right Thigh: 33in (down 2 in.)

Stomach: 66in (same as last week)

Man-Boobs: 56in (down 2in.)

Lost weight in some REALLY random places this week!

Anyways, here’s the pictures (this week on left, week 1 on right):


So, I may have been depressed because my scale was broken and I actually weighed about 10lbs more than I thought I did, especially after I literally worked my ass off to lose weight this week, but after looking at the pictures, I feel better.  It’s obvious that I’ve lost weight, so I’m content.  Anyways, that’s all for now, so I guess I’ll see you guys on Sunday for my “Big” post!  You guys have a great weekend and don’t forget to like my fanpage at and follow me on Twitter @nickntallent84!


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Thought of the day–8/17/2012 “(Shrinking) Fatass in a skinny world” Diet: Week 3

Fo shizzles, my homizzles!  What’s up!?  So, it’s Friday again, and jeez, the weeks just seem to be flying by.  I feel like I’m gonna be 86 before I can blink my eyes!  No wonder Hobby Lobby already looks like Christmas-Town; at the warp speed that time is traveling, it’ll be Christmas by next week!  Anyways, like usual, I did all my weights and measurements for you guys…well, I tried to anyways.  I stepped on the scale this morning about umpteen billion times, receiving nothing but “ERR” which in scale-speak is “GET YOUR FAT ASS OFF OF ME, NOW!”  In between all of those ERR readings though, I did get one reading that said 381, and two that said 375.  Well, I’m kinda doubting that I lost 27 lbs. this week, (as awesome as that would be), so I guess I’ll add this scale to the growing collection of them in my scale graveyard, AKA, the bathroom closet.  This’ll be the third initiate to the group in the last year.  Sad, but true.  So, I guess I’ll have to sorta estimate how much weight I lost this week, but I have to tell you, it probably wasn’t much.  You see, (yeah, it’s excuse time), my wife and I went to visit my family last weekend and my grandma, being the loving and wonderful woman that she is, made us roast beef, green beans, carrots, cornbread, and apple pie for dinner the night we arrived.  Then, we woke up to fried eggs, gravy, homemade biscuits and jelly, bacon, and fried tenderloin for breakfast.  Then, there was a cookout for lunch, which included pasta salad, hot dogs, corn, green beans, and pulled pork.  So, you see?!  There was really no way for me to stay on my diet this weekend with all that amazing food around, and let me tell you, you don’t pass up Granny’s cooking.  That is a sin, and it will send you straight to Hell, believe me.  Anyways, I did great the rest of the week, until Wednesday that is, when I parked in front of a giant sign advertising pizza, and then decided that I must have some, immediately.  So yeah.  I did.  Anyways, I also want you guys to know that I walked/jogged some this week, and I also started working out.  So those things kind of throw stuff off too.  Anyways, enough with the excuses and on with the measurements and pictures, because I know that’s what you guys really want.  Oh, it’s not?  Oh well, then.  You’re getting them anyways.

Diet: Day 15-

Weighed myself this morning (a bajillion times). Current weight: ??? (but definitely NOT 375lbs.)

Clothing size: Pants-52-54, Shirt-5xl (no change)


Left Bicep: 18 in (down 1/2 in.)
Right Bicep: 19in (up 1/2 in.)

Left Thigh: 34.5in (down 1 in.)
Right Thigh: 35in (down 1/5 in.)

Stomach: 66in (down 1.5 in.)

Man-Boobs: 58in (down 1in.)

Picture time!!!!

If you ask me, it kinda looks the same as last week.  I don’t know though.  What do you guys think?  The one on the left is this week, the one on the right is last week.

Here’s the shirt I still can’t fit in. Maybe by the end of next month?  I hope so!

And finally, my personal favorite, the “Let’s show off our jelly rolls” pictures!

Anyways, I guess that’s all for today.  Forgive me for not being able to give you guys my actual weight.  Maybe next week.  Anyways, until then, I’m off to browse the internet for a scale that my fat ass might not destroy in three seconds.  See you guys later!
Oh, and P.S.–If you guys haven’t yet, go like my Facebook fanpage for the blog to know when new posts are up and what the new topics will be!  Just follow the link to   Also, follow me on Twitter @nickntallent84!  Thanks, everyone!

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Thought of the day–8/10/2012 “(Shrinking) Fatass in a skinny world” Diet: Week 2

Good morning peoples!!!  It’s another Friday and all I have to say is TGIF!! Well, I also have to say hallelujah because the high today is only something like, 84, and that is heavenly compared to the last couple of months.  It lets me know that if I hang in there just a few more weeks, Fall will be on it’s way and I will finally be able to walk outside without suffering a heat stroke.  Anyways, since it IS Friday, that means it’s diet update day, so here’s a bunch of info for all of you nosey people and some pictures that will surely be turned into a meme someday, which will end up going viral.  Yeah, let’s hope not.  Anyways, here ya go!

Diet: Day 8-

Weighed myself this morning. Current weight: 403 (down 7lbs. from last week)

Clothing size: Pants-52-54, Shirt-5xl


Left Bicep: 18.5in (same as last week)
Right Bicep: 18.5in (down an inch from last week)

Left Thigh: 35.5in (same as last week)
Right Thigh: 35.5in (same as last week)

Stomach: 67.5in (down from 70in. last week)

Man-Boobs: 59in (down from 62in. last week)

How these random measurement changes occured, I have no idea.  I did lose 7 lbs., but apparently I lost it in some strange places.  Anyways, get ready to shield your eyes, because it’s picture time!


Doesn’t look like there is as much danger of the button popping off and blinding you this week.








Next, it’s the shirt I would like to be able to comfortably fit into when Fall finally shows up:

Still doesn’t fit, but hopefully in a month or so…we will see!

And next, the cutoff tee shirt.  There isn’t much to notice here today, but again, maybe in a month or so.

Alright!  Well, there you go!  I didn’t binge all week and eat pizza and chocolate until I popped!  I actually lost 7lbs!  Only 193lbs. to go until my goal weight!  So, until next time, see you guys later!
Categories: Dietupdate, TOTD | 1 Comment

Thought of the day–8/03/2012 “(Shrinking) Fatass in a skinny world” Diet: Week 1

So, have you guys ever done something that you are really, REALLY embarrassed about?  Hmmm??? Well, I’m sure you have.  We all have.  And, since today is Friday, that means it is “Diet Update Day”, or what I would like to henceforth call “(Shrinking) Fatass In A Skinny World Day”.  It also means that I have to put a lot of embarrassing information on here in order to keep you guys updated and to hold myself accountable, and make sure that this time, I really stick with my diet plans.  Besides, it’s not like anyone who’s seen me doesn’t know these things just by looking at my fat ass, so here goes.

Diet: Day 1-

Weighed myself this morning.  Current weight: 410lbs. (Yeah…that’s a lot)

Clothing size: Pants-52-54, Shirt-5xl


Left Bicep: 18.5in
Right Bicep: 19.5in

Left Thigh: 35.5in (bigger than a lot of people’s waists, just FYI)
Right Thigh: 35.5in

Stomach: 70in

Man-Boobs: 62in

Alrighty then.  Yeah, that’s probably weigh more than you need to know….weigh more…get it…weigh…uh, yeah, okay then.  Anyways, this is as much a record keeping journal for me as it is a progress checker for you, so I will keep all this stuff on here just so that I can keep track of it. 

And finally, picture time:

First, there is me in a normal shirt…I wear something similar to this every day.  As you can probably tell, it can’t be buttoned.

Well, it CAN be buttoned, but then you are in terrible danger of losing an eye…

So, you’ve seen what I wear, so here is something I want to be able to wear here in a few months.  The shirt is a size smaller, though you can’t really tell by the picture.

Next I’ll post the dreaded before/after pics…you know, the ones where everyone takes off all of their clothes and lets their jelly rolls droop down for everyone to marvel over when they are skinny later?  Okay, well, I’m not taking my clothes off, but I am wearing a sleeveless tee shirt that hasn’t been “fat-peopled” (aka-stretched out so that it isn’t so tight).  I warn you, these pictures are graphic…you might wanna just stop now…

Okay, so for those of you who took the chance, I’m assuming that if you are still reading this, you aren’t blind…yeah, I’m sure you’ve seen worse at your local beach or amusement park, but still, this is me, and so it’s pretty embarrassing.  Of course, that’s why I’m doing it.  I want a body that I don’t have to be embarrassed about.  You know?
Anyways, so, I ate breakfast today, decided I wanted cereal.  Fast, easy, good, yeah.  I walk to the pantry, pull out the box, measure out the appropriate serving size, and this is what I got:
Do you see that bowl?  That sad, sorry bowl with almost nothing in it?  Yeah, that is a serving size of my delightfully delicious Special K.  A HUGE 3/4 cup serving.  That’s enough to feed an army, right?  Yeah, if you are an army of ants. 
I started eating my “bowl” of cereal at 8:39 this morning.  Seven bites and two minutes later, I was done.  That is why people lose weight on the “Special K” diet!  They are STARVING!  Anyways, let’s just hope the rest of my meals get a little bigger…a fetus couldn’t live on servings like that, much less me.  I’m a big man, a BIG BIG man.  And I’ll be a dead man if all my meals consist of such meager portions.  Let’s hope becoming a skinny bitch is worth it, huh?  Tune in next Friday to see if I lost any weight or if I just went into a hunger rage and ate my weight in peanut M&M’s!  See you guys then!

Categories: Dietupdate, TOTD | 1 Comment

Thought of the day–7/27/2012 “Weekly Update” Week 1

Well hello out there, all you virtual peeps!  Okay, well, maybe you aren’t virtual, maybe that is me.  I guess it just depends on which side of this computer we are on, doesn’t it?  Anyways, enough with my loony ranting.  So I am FINALLY caught up with my thoughts of the day for this week, which I had to do because I was introducing new daily categories every day this week, and sadly, I missed Wednesday and Thursday, which I’m sure kept you guys on the edge of your seat in anticipation.  Am I right?  No.  Oh, okay then.  WHATEVER!

So it’s Friday, and as I mentioned a few weeks ago, my wife and I are going to start on Weight Watchers.  Now, I’ve done this diet before, but hopefully this time, the results will stick.  I guess if I can actually stick to it for longer than six months, that might happen.  That is why this is good for me.  Fridays will now be “Weekly Update” days, where I let you guys know how I did on my diet the previous week and how much weight I lost.  I will also post pictures so you guys can see for yourself.  This way, if I do bad, I know I will have you guys to answer to, and I will be embarassed, and I will be fat, and you know, it’s a vicious cycle and all.  Anyways, so yeah, Fridays will be diet update day.  But sadly, even though today is Friday, we haven’t started yet, so I guess my first real update will come next week.

So, until then, here is a picture to cheer you up!

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